Concerning Pronunciation in Mantra Japa

Concerning Pronunciation in Mantra Japa  

                When it comes to Mantra japa, there are regularly two schools that one comes across. The school which holds itself the standard of orthodoxy and holds correct pronunciation and grammar almost more dear than life itself and then there exists the rather new school which puts forth that whatever is in one’s own heart and intention is more important than grammar and pronunciation. As for myself, I try to hold a middle ground believing that both paths of thought hold merit.
                 The Vedas have stood the test of time. Due to the untiring dedication of Brahman tradition in India. The Vedas (only recently a written form having existed) have come through nearly the last ten thousand years unscathed and untouched by time. This is partially due to the first school mentioned above. Without a tireless effort to preserve the ancient scriptures and the grammar, meter and pronunciation that comes with them the Sanskrit language would have developed and changed leaving us with a tainted form.   
                There are also reports that some mantras have been formed specifically for the sound and vibration caused by the combination of syllables to achieve some desired effect. Logically, if these same mantras were recited without a proper pronunciation and meter this same vibration could not be achieved and one would only create a shadow of what should be.   
                Though, as earlier stated, the second school of thought also holds its own merit. Adi Shankaracharya’s Bhavani Ashtakam is a prayer to goddess Bhawani or Durga saying in the third stanza…


Na Janaami Dhanam, Na cha dhyana yogam,
Na janami thanthram, na cha sthothra manthram,
Na janami poojam, na cha nyasa yogam,
Gatisthwam, Gatisthwam thwam ekaa Bhavani

Neither do I know how to give,
Nor do I know how to meditate,
Neither do I know Thanthra*,
Nor do I know stanzas of prayer,
Neither do I know how to worship,
Nor do I know the art of yoga,
So you are my refuge and my only refuge, Bhavani  

                Simply said, even without the knowledge of proper pronunciation of mantras a person can still commune with the divine; though I cannot say if this is easier or more difficult. 
                In my view, the second school should be used by those unaccustomed to Sanskrit. The divine does not turn away the dumb or uneducated (Not to say that anyone who is not accustomed to Sanskrit is either). Even Valmiki, the writer of the great epic the Ramayana, when he first came across Narada he, being a bandit, was so uneducated he could not repeat the complex mantras Narada Muni asked him to recite and so Narada gave to Valmiki the name Rama; Rama, the name in which the entirety of the Vedas are said to reside. Once one is educated in Sanskrit though, I agree that it is his duty to tirelessly work toward perfection and become a part of the living history that has preserved the scriptures for the past ten millennia.

Namma Bengaluru

Namma Bengaluru

                 People have commented on how my trip to Bangalore was nothing but a waste. A waste of money that I could have used elsewhere, a waste of time I could have spent completing my degree and a waste of work when I could have been doing other things. To those people I have to disagree completely.              
  Bangalore taught me how to live, how to laugh and how to love. In the faces of the people of Bangalore I saw my fate; in their eyes I saw my family; and in the heart of Bangalore I saw my motherland. In Bangalore I was saw the utmost hopes for humanity that raises one’s own heart to the sky. While I also saw the failings of humanity and what needed to be changed for our own society to survive.            
   In Bangalore I learned my purpose, found my own courage in life and discovered the essence of my soul. In spice filled streets and grand gardens my mind exploded with idea and thought. On lonely red dirt roads and green coconut groves my imagination soared. Upon high terraces from which the city stretched far out below me to the sunlit horizons I could fly.              

     My mornings were spent among family; permeated with the sounds of the chanted Vedas to awaken the Lord from his slumber. In the afternoon, the sound of the bustling and crowded streets, hawkers and beggars following my every step and the welcome sight of friends in college and on their way to work. The evening was signaled by the sounds of conchs from temples that dotted the city, the muzens call from atop the tall towers of mosques and the church bells ringing for Saint John and Saint George. The rains would come and wash away the days filth; bringing new life to the city as it lit up in a beautiful neon daze.              

   Life was never boring. Life in Bangalore is grand whether one was the utmost pauper or the richest businessman. Festivals and shows, sights galore, always smiling faces to meet; Bangalore is a welcome home to all. Art and music can be heard, seen and felt through the city at all times. Hearts ablaze with artistic flame are kindled to full light from the atmosphere Bangalore has given.            

   Bangalore is all this and more. In that wonderful city, that beautiful place I learned who I was and what it means to be alive, to be human. A part of my heart will always remain in the garden city where cool air conditioned breezes bring the monsoon rains. A part of my soul will always remain in Bangalore just as a piece of Lord Krishna is always in Vrindavin.      

         This is why my life in Bangalore means so much to me. Why a piece of me will always call Bangalore home. Thank you to all the wonderful people I left behind and I envy that you get to stay and I cannot… yet. I will always love Namma Bengaluru

Timeless India

Thank you to everyone who has helped me on my path. To everyone who has helped me explore and fall ever deeper in love with India.
Timeless India:

                Many people have asked me why I started traveling to India at all and the only answer I can give is that India called me to her. Traveling through that country you realize that India is not simply a patch of earth but a vibrant living thing. Bharat Mata is a name given by locals meaning Mother India and she is just that and for some inexplicable reason all my life I felt a pull by Mother India almost as a human calls her child home, I felt as if I were being called home.          

       India is a land of multiplicities. Everything is in seen in multiples of each other; god is seen in millions of forms, the sheer amount of languages being spoken numbers in the hundreds and the cultures and peoples associated with these are even more numerous. Ageless India and yet on the verge of becoming a Twenty-first century world power; one can find bronze and iron age chants still being sung in temples that are almost as old while skyscrapers reach to the heavens even taller than the temples, dances that have been danced for a millennia are performed while Bollywood and more contemporary styles bring together fusions of the ancient and new.          


         India is also a land of paradoxes. Unbelievable beauty exists among her architecture, music, landscape, and culture while poverty is an all to apparent problem. India almost seems to exist in the past, present and future at one time. Relying on the timeless practices and rituals the she has followed since before even civilization yet striving so quickly for the future that parts of her are left in all three times.              
    This is why I have fallen in love with my Mother India. With all her variations she is a beautiful young maiden and a harsh and ancient crone. She is a symbol of peace in so many ways and yet she has been invaded since time immemorial, India has survived and changed and grown. India never dies and at times it seems India will outlast the world. She is haven to me as a port in the storm, as a mother is to her child… Mother India.

Sight of the Lord

   The bus rumbled slowly up the hills of Tirumala, the sun just beginning to rise above the landscape pierced the thick mists that had formed on the holy mountains. The air was electrified with devotion; my first sight of the holy temple of Tirupati was of a giant Shank and Chakra glowing in the morning on the peak of the mountain. My heart accelerated its pace and my mind leapt into a frantic want to see that most ancient image of god.
                We entered into the temple after an eternity of waiting. My heart and mind were exhausted but I still ached to have darshan of the lord. Before entering into the inner-sanctum I made the simple prayer and hope that I would be able to see the lord properly. The crowd behind and in front of me were relentless… the pushing was almost frightening. One could be caught and pushed in any direction without digression and the simple mass of bodies all clamoring for a simple look into the golden doors was vast. 

 I entered the inner-sanctum and came face to face with the image of my lord. Balaji had heeded my prayer and I was pushed into a pocket directly in front of the ageless Srinivasa. Reality and time slowed to a stop, all noise for me was lost and nothing existed except for Venkateshwara and myself. I stood in awe of the grandness, the beauty and grace of the lord. It almost felt as if he was staring back at me, deep into my soul. With that single glance of the Lord my mind was in absolute bliss and I felt as if so many questions, so many confusions I had were all answered in that momentary look into the face of god. My mind was quieted and my heart beat with sheer adrenaline.
                After the darshan, that for me lasted eternities, I was pushed from the face of my lord. I craned my neck for even one tiny look more into that most holy of holies. I exited the temple in complete calmness with the only aspiration of coming to see my lord again. I realized that tears had been flowing down my cheeks as I felt my face wet; I circumbulated the temple in parikrama, the names of God swirling in my mind. Everything, all I have ever wanted or thought suddenly made sense... all questions were answered leaving me with the memory of my visit to abode of Sri Srinivasa.

 

India Journal- The first few days

Day 1`- Delhi


                I landed in Delhi and was immediately relieved that the 16 hour flight was over. With no leg room, three crying babies in the row next to me and some uncle behind me that felt the need to put his hand on the back of my head rest every time he had to get up for the bathroom but being here has made it all worth it. I realize now how much I really missed the sights and sounds of India.  The second I left the airport the humid, end of monsoon season air clung to my skin but I never enjoyed it more. Anything was better than a freezing plane.
                After I arrived I realized how much was going on in the country and city. Anna Hazare, the leader of the movement against corruption here in India was just arrested last night here in Delhi. Kiran Bedi, India’s most famous female policeman and staunch supporter of Ana was also arrested for peaceful protests. The whole atmosphere makes you wonder what it felt like when Gandhiji was protesting against the British. 
                 The protests are also something unique to India. In almost any other country I can imagine they would have become fierce riots by now but because this is India not a single finger has been lifted at all. Supporters of Anna Hazare have subscribed to complete peaceful civil disobedience. So I can quite easily say that because I am here I am seeing history in the making.    
                My friend’s new house is gorgeous and it’s nice to see some familiar faces. Tomorrow I will be left alone to do what I please. Let’s see what I come up with..

                Day 2- Delhi 

I woke up today to the sound of the Vedas, ringing bells and the sweet smell of jasmine flowers and incense. Due to jetlag this was at 6:30am and so after my morning puja and chai I did not have much to do until much later in the morning. Listening to bhajans in the morning I decided to go to the ISKCON temple in Delhi to see Lord Krishna. Though I am not a member ISKCON I have always enjoyed their temples because of their cleanliness and enthusiasm. Just as Adi Shankaracharya wrote:
 Bhaja Govindam Bhaja Govindam Govindam Bhaja Mudamithe Samprapte Sannihite Kaale Nahi Nahi Rakshati Dukrijinkaare.
                Meaning simply, worship the lord! Oh fools, grammar will not save you in the end. Though I do not totally agree with ISKCON from an orthodox standpoint I do admit that they have opened a gateway to those unlearned in the Vedas and orthodox scriptures by Bhakti. Which in my idea, devotion and purity, is by far more important than though proper performance of ritual. Though at the same time, I agree we must do everything to save those rituals in our mind as a base for our devotion.      

I, being white and wearing a choti and saffron dhoti, was confused as being a pundit while I was there at least a dozen times. It was nice though to not be looked at twice because of what I was wearing or how my hair was tied, at least in the way people usually look at me in… utter confusion. After, I went on a quick shopping spree around Connaught Place, A market left over from colonial times. The architecture is purely British but the shops are incredibly global. You can find anything from Levi Jeans and KFC to hand woven Indian tapestries and French cuisine. Being mid-day the weather in Delhi had become stifling and so I headed home as soon as I could.  

Day 3- Delhi

                I awoke and went through my usual morning rituals; showering, waiting for my tea and talking to my parents. During the day I stayed at home visiting Sauravs Dadi Ma (Fathers mothers) and relaxing since I know soon I won’t have a minute to myself after the beginning of classes of my program. She is an amazing woman with stories to tell that could keep someone listening for hours. She could tell about her many international trips, the incredibly connected people she knows, her time protesting and being arrested only to be placed in Tihar political prison for years. Her sense of humor and he grace of speech bring to light many of the undercurrents of the situation now with Anna Hazare and the current state of affairs of the Indian governmental system. 

In the evening we left for bowling with Piyush… I bowled the worst I ever have…. And then went to the acclaimed best Panwalla in all of Delhi. It was a sight, the nicest cars and richest people all crowded around this tiny many in the city center of Delhi. He has been the only Panwalla I have ever seen to be able to change 500 rupee notes without complaining. I have to agree though that he does make the best pan I have ever had.  
                We also got a chance to stop by India Gate and see the protests in support of Anna Hazare and the anti-corruption bill. The atmosphere was infectious; so many people with a single goal. Indian flags were held by nearly everyone and those who did not carry flags danced or raised their arms in protest. Though this was a protest it was interesting to see that there was no air of animosity, if only toward the central government. There was no feeling of hate except at what was being protested. The feeling was so infectious I almost wanted to stay longer than we did.

                Day 4- Delhi 

                Today it was raining badly but I took the car to Khan Market to buy some topis in support of Anna Hazare… of course that’s the excuse I give but truly I’ve always liked the look of the Nehru topi. I then visited Qutab Minar; the largest free standing minaret in the world. The whole complex was amazing. I huge mixture of architectural styles as the complex existed from the 11^th century on wards. The Ashok pillar stands in the center courtyard of the complex. A feat of engineering of which even today we cannot compete metallurgicaly. I had known that to build the complex a lot of stone was taken from Hindu temples that the Delhi sultanate had destroyed but I was surprised that one could quite clearly make out the carvings of Hindu deities on many of the stones. There were even a few stones which had complete “wall” deities on them, undisturbed and undamaged. I did have very mixed feelings about this. On one hand the architecture and feat of engineering for the complex was amazing but on the other the builders had defaced so many sacred temples I became slightly angry though of course nothing can be done now.  

                In the evening I met up with a few close friends that I hadn’t seen in months. It was great to see them and feel as if it were freshman year of college again. We danced the night away at a place called Shiro. An amazing club/ restraunt but I was surprised that as good as the music was and as strong the drinks were very few people were dancing. Let’s hope the clubs in Bangalore are different.

               
Day 5-8 Bangalore 

                I arrived in Bangalore amidst the hustle and bustle just before Krishna Janmashtami. I spent the first two days reacquainting myself with Bangalore and helping Poojas grandmother “Pathi” get ready for the festivities. I really missed Bangalore; easily it is one of my favorite cities in the world. The first puja for the holiday was meant for only family and so was very sweet to be a part of. Tomorrow evening Pathi will have nearly 30 people from her Carnatic singing group here to celebrate properly.
                The orientation to Christ University has been fantastic. Everyone has been extremely helpful and the program seems to have taken every precaution for the participants of the program. We are required to wear formal clothes when the program starts officially on Monday

                Tonight I am meeting Vamsi. It’ll be great to see him as it has been a year or two since I have met him. He will be here for the rest of the time that I will be here in Bangalore so I am a bit more at ease with navigating day to day life here knowing that if I have any real problem I can have someone my own age show me the ropes. I have also finally gotten in touch with Mana. One my Poojas best friends from high school. She seems extremely nice on the phone and says she will help show me around campus and the surrounding area. 

                So far a great beginning in Bangalore; good friends, good food and a good school, it looks like this will turn out to be an amazing experience. 

The Politics of a Dress Code

Yesterday I went to a panel on the discussion of transgender topics. It is hard for me, as I am not transexual, to sometimes understand the feelings of a transexual person, though one comment really sparked my interest. The comment was how, even though on the outside a certain person may look calm and collected, on the inside they may continually have that tiny voice of worry speaking to them and making them wonder what the people around them are thinking or looking at while they walk by; wearing heels and make up for a transgendered woman or being bound and wearing mens clothing for a transgendered man was what felt right and comfortable for them inside but they may always have that tiny bit of fear about how people may react. The conversation continued that this voice of worry wasn't known if this was out of fear of how unpredictable can be (as the topic of physical abuse had already been touched on).

I can relate to this, wearing dhoti, shika and tilak around I am sometimes worried about what others may think or do even though I am doing, for myself, what feels right and comfortable. Stares of disbelief and confusion are quite common when you walk by a group of unsuspecting people

Depending on the area and people the range of emotions can change, among a group of Indians or other Hindu's I would feel very comfortable. Even if I was the only one dressed in dhoti, since I know they would understand why I dress the way I do. Walking by the average person on the street I may be worried about the stares I get or I may enjoy the face of disbelief I may give someone.

My favorite times are those when someone will shake off the disbelief and come to me directly and ask me what it is and why I am dressed the way I am. This takes away any irrational fear I may have as I realize the person is not an ignorant bigot but a curious and interested human being.  

I have gotten some very rude comments from ignorant people before, as they think I am wearing a dress or think I have some dirt on my face but in the end this is a tiny minority of people who will never accept anyone and are most likely more self-concious than we are.

All I can say, to all those Transgendered people out there, you've got courage! Keep doing what you do and enjoy it. Do what makes you feel right. Do what makes you feel you!

My Conundrum on Dualism

Today a friend and I were discussing the idea of duality (ex. a tree is separate in existence from its surroundings or the idea of good and evil) in theistic thought and I realized why the idea of duality had never made any sense to me.

In my "world view" I realized that duality had never made sense to me because since childhood I had always believed that all things were a part of each other and the universe was actually one.. I guess you could say entity. I don't believe I was ever taught this view of life... it has always simply been a part of me. Considering Christianity is full of duality (good vs. evil, God vs. Satan) and that is the basic religion I was raised with.

I tried to explain my views with the analogy of a black hole.. the black hole representing the ultimate truth or reality. 3 astronauts were being pulled in (aka.. Good, Neutrality and Evil).. as the men are pulled in their atoms are slowly pulled apart and they can see (from a purely philosophical standpoint) that they are made of the same basic materials. Then as they get closer to ultimate truth they start to intermix and one cannot be seen as being different from the others. Finally they are pulled in as the realization of oneness is complete.

A friend gave me a slightly less violent analogy of white light being shot through a prism. Though it is all from a single source the light is spread into many different forms (the different forms of existence or reality). This I think is a slightly nicer analogy compared to the one I thought of.

Then my friend began asking me that since good and evil were actually the same then why should we be good. This is my thought, yes, good and evil, light and dark are all from the same primordial source and true realization is to realize there interconnectedness but from that primordial source they have spread and become there own manifestations and so we should continue on the higher path of good... even as we know that good and evil are actual of the same source.

I haven't thought this out totally but these are my own private ideas.

Any ideas???